I Never Meant to Cause You Trouble
by longlostcullen
Summary: Alice's human life to the time when she was sent away to the time when she finally found her family. Enjoy and review.
1. Chapter 1

**_Have no fear I am not abandoning Your Guardian Angel. I just was thinking about Alice and then this story started to formulate. I'm trying to keep it as accurate as possible to the timeline and what Stephanie has said. I don't own Twilight or any of the characters. Review and Enjoy. Again a huge thanks to my Beta MonkeyMojo. I hope I do one of your favorites justice. _**

* * *

"You're sending me away?! Why Mama? Don't you want me anymore?" I sobbed helplessly.

I kicked and screamed as the men in white dragged me out to the van.

"Alice, this for you. I will always want you. I will always love you," my mother said.

"Liar! Let me go, let me go!" I screamed.

My voice was becoming raw, and tears were streaming down my face.

I could see my mother holding Cynthia back as she tried to race to my aid.

My father was standing beside my mother looking distraught, as though he wasn't sure if he should take me into his arms or just let the men do their job.

"Please Daddy don't let them take me! I promise to not have visions anymore, just let me stay!" I screamed.

Didn't they love me anymore? Didn't they want me anymore?

"Alice, come back! Come back!" I heard Cynthia sob.

The men threw me into the back of the van and proceeded to take me to the Mississippi State Asylum...straight to Hell.

I continued to sob all the way to Jackson.

I cried for my mother, father, and Cynthia but no one heard me, no one cared.

When we finally stopped the men hoisted from the back of the van and led me in through the front doors.

"Hey Doc, here is your schizo case," one man yelled.

Then I saw him. The man who would make my life here unbearable.

"Hello Mary," he said coldly, glancing at my file.

I had never been more terrified in all my life. I had heard the rumors that this place was beyond miserable.

The patients hardly ever lived to see daylight beyond these walls again. Why would my parents do this to me? I had thought my precognition was a gift.

Apparently I was wrong. This was a curse; it had to be if would take me away from Cynthia. I glanced all around me in fear.

I saw the patients muttering to themselves looking as though they were half starved. Some of them were sitting against the wall rocking back and forth trying to will themselves away from here, tears streaming down their eyes. I looked down at my feet with tears welling in my eyes.

"Forgive me father, for I have sinned," I sobbed quietly.

"Well Mary, I'm Doctor Stevens. I will be treating you for your schizophrenia. You will have shock treatments every five days. Adrian take this patient to her quarters," Doctor Stevens said briskly and walked away.

I became even more terrified of the horrors that awaited me and I glanced toward the orderly, fear in my eyes.

"Come along Mary. We don't want you standing out here too long," he said gently as he took my arm and lead me down the hallway.

I had never been more terrified in all my life. I had never even heard of shock treatment. What was going to happen to me? For the first time in my life, I didn't know the answer.

* * *

As the man named Adrian led me down the hallway I noticed that his hands seemed absolutely frigid, as though he has them stuck in an ice bucket.

"Are you cold Mary? You're trembling awfully bad," Adrian remarked.

"I'm not cold; I'm terrified. What are they going to do to me?" I asked in a shaky voice. It sounded as though I had a stuttering problem.

He looked at me with pity and grief in his eyes. "I'm not sure Mary. But have faith. God will bring you through this," He said in a comforting tone.

I took a closer look at my companion and noticed that he had deathly pale skin. His skin almost blended in with his uniform and his eyes were a gentle topaz color. He looked handsome and sweet. I hoped he would always be this nice to me. I hoped that he wouldn't abandon me like my parents.

"Are you always going to be this nice to me?" I asked bluntly. He looked at me and smiled.

"Yes Mary, I will always treat you like the gentle lady I know you are," he said softly.

Perhaps this Adrian would make my time in Hell a little more bearable. He could be my means of escape.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Ok here is the second chapter. Here's the deal (I just got a flashback to The Godfather) I won't post anymore to this story until I get some reviews! I like Alice and I want to continue this story but I don't see the point if no one is going to read it. So for Alice review...please! gives the infamous Alice pleading face_**

* * *

I sat cowered in a corner, shaking. I couldn't sleep at all last night, the screams that filled the night air were horrific. I could hear the night guard beating the patients who were crying or screaming.

I had never felt more utterly helpless. I couldn't save them, I couldn't even help them. As I sat in the corner of the padded room Adrian came in.

"Mary, it's time to cut your hair," he said is soft tone. His voice reminded of wind chimes.

"C-cut my hair?" I squeaked. My hair was already quite short. I had practically begged my mother to let me get it cut like the bobs that were coming into style for my eighteenth birthday.

"Yes, I'm afraid we have to do this for all of the patients that come in here for lice and the shock treatments," he said grimly. As soon as he said shock treatments a vision began clouding my mind...

_I saw myself on a long metallic table and I was being gagged by some strange looking device. It had a ball in the center and I was strapped to the table by leather cuffs._

_Tears were streaming down my eyes and I heard the wretched Dr. Stevens tell the technician, "Hal give little Mary at least forty-five volts," with cruel humor. _

"Mary? Mary, are you alright?" Adrian asked, worry coating his voice.

"Yes, I'm fine," I gasped. It would seem that my doctor had made an absolute decision to start my treatment today.

"Alright Mary let's get you to the barber," Adrian said doubtfully.

"Please Adrian, call me Alice," I said with the ghost of a smile.

"Of course Alice," Adrian said warmly. As he lead me down the hallway the scene looked the same as yesterday, but that didn't stop my hurting for these poor people, my yearning to reach out and help them.

I was yanked from my reverie however by the sound of electric clippers. My eyes widened in horror. I didn't want them to cut my hair.

"No need to worry Alice. I will cut your hair," Adrian said. I looked at him gratefully. I knew he wouldn't make me bald, but I knew I wouldn't have much hair left by the end of this. As he started the clippers tears started running down my face. I liked my hair, it reminded me of who I am, who I used to be.

I suppose there is symbolism in him cutting off my hair, severing ties with the life that no longer wanted me.

"All done Alice," Adrian said. I took my time looking in the mirror; I didn't think I could handle it. As I looked in the mirror I was prepared for the worst. However I was pleasantly surprised.

I would never tell anyone this but I liked it. I looked like a boy but not. My face looked more petite and my eyes looked so big. I looked rather... pretty. As I was admiring my hair I didn't notice Dr. Stevens come in the room.

"Ah, Adrian finished with her hair, well good. I wanted to get started on her treatment immediately," Dr. Stevens said in a brisk and cold voice.

"Of course Doctor," Adrian sneered. I had begun trembling so violently that I couldn't even see straight.

"Well, take her to the room so I can get this over with," Dr. Stevens said angrily.

"Come on Alice," Adrian coaxed. He led me down a series of hallways, though I doubted I would remember any of this. I had a feeling that this "shock therapy" was going to be the death of me.

* * *

As I walked into the room tears began welling in my eyes.

I had never been so scared in my entire life. Why would my parents do this to me? They were supposed to love me and instead they send me to hell. I began to wonder if I would ever see them or Cynthia again.

"Ah, good, you're here. James, take Mary and strap her to the table," Dr. Stevens said.

I glanced at the man who had taken hold of my arm and noticed his eyes were changing from a sinister burgundy color to pitch black, they entranced me. I had never seen anything like that.

"Come along Mary. Let's get you strapped in," James said with black humor in his voice. I looked back at Adrian, frightened.

But he wasn't looking at me; he was looking at James with the deepest loathing in his eyes.

I looked away and looked at the metallic table in my vision. In all my years of living I had never feared a table more than right now.


	3. Chapter 3

**_Fear not I haven't forsaken YGA I just felt inspired for this. I have it all in my head I just need to write it out. Major kudos to MonkeyMojo for being my beta. I had Aiden on my mind. Before I forget due to lack of reviews this story will now have ransoms. So if you want the next chapter I want to see the reviews at 17._**

* * *

Pain...

I can hear distant growling like wild animals. I should be terrified but I can't find it in me. The pain is like an all consuming wildfire. I'm remembering flashes, but the darkness...

* * *

_"Hal, give little Mary here 45 volts and let's be done with this. I have enough crazy people to deal with today."_

_"Yes, Dr. Stevens."_

_I hear some machine whirring and things are happening that I don't understand. All of a sudden I can taste fire in my mouth, shocking and burning._

_I try to scream to tell them to stop but nothing. It takes my voice away._

_"Ah shit, I turned it up to high. Her nose is bleeding." I hear Hal leaving._

_I try to open my eyes but I can't. I try to speak to Adrian but nothing but rasping noises fill my voice box. I hear Adrian talk to me, his voice is so soothing, like the scent of freesias or lavender._

_"Please forgive me Alice," I hear him say._

_I don't understand. I feel him undoing the latches on my left wrist and he picks up my wrist. I feel teeth slicing through my skin and I try to scream but I can't. Then he bites my neck. What in God's name is going on?_

* * *

The animalistic sounds continue and I hear snapping noises. I feel the cool grass beneath my skin and wonder how I got outside. My mind fades and I am no longer Mary Alice Brandon.

My skin feels hard like marble and my throat burns like there is an all consuming Hellfire there. I gasp with the pain of it. I try to think but my mind is clouded with a vision.

* * *

_A beautiful young woman answers the door. Her soft caramel hair flows softly at her shoulders._

_Her eyes are the most beautiful topaz color._

_"Hello Esme. I'm Alice," I say._

_"H-Hello Alice," Esme replies. Her voice is so soft, like a weeping willow billowing in the wind._

_She looks at me confused. "Is Carlisle here? I would like to speak with him if you don't mind." _

_"Esme, who is at the door?" And there he is. The man whom I have been looking up to these past years._

_He is the father I don't remember. So wise and caring. I feel my eyes widen in excitement. _

_I hear another voice. Deep and soothing, it calls to my very soul. Makes me complete. "Alice, I think you're scaring them." I turn to face the strange voice..._

* * *

Alice...Is that who I am then?

I can't remember anything. Everything is just darkness. The Hellfire is still there in my throat.

I don't know what to do and I start to panic. I have no idea where I am. These woods are so unfamiliar to me. I see a deer skittering away and my instincts consume me... I'm no longer human.

I run to the animal and tackle it to the ground. I rip into the animal's neck and drink it's blood and the Hellfire dies down.

It's still there, still consuming, but tolerable. I look around to observe my surroundings. I don't know any of this.

My eyesight is so sharp and visual. My skin feels so smooth and cold and hard, marble like.

I stop for a minute and I realize I don't feel my heart. My hand shoots up to my chest and I feel nothing.

I'm empty and I feel incomplete. I don't understand. I have to find Carlisle and Esme. It seems they have the answers that I seek.

As I recall the vision my thoughts turn to that deep and soothing voice. Just thinking about it and my face subconsciously turns up in a smile.

The feeling of being incomplete disappears. It's so beautiful. I pray that night to whoever may be listening that I can find that voice. The voice that has stolen my unbeating heart.


End file.
